Dating lexicon · Dating
Benching means keeping someone on the substitutes’ bench as an option, keeping them interested without ever really choosing them.
Benching comes from sport: if you’re on the bench, you’re in the squad, but you don’t play. In dating it means someone keeps you available as an option in case things don’t work out with others. He gets in touch just often enough that you don’t disappear completely – but he never really chooses you.
For the one on the bench, it feels like endless waiting. There are nice messages, maybe even a meet-up, but everything stays non-committal. A typical line: “You’re really great, I just don’t want to rush anything right now.”
Benching is closely related to breadcrumbing, where small signals are also used to keep the other person interested.
On DaddyBoy
Say openly what you’d like, and ask what the other person is looking for. Being honest saves you both time – and nobody has to sit on the bench.
Related
- BreadcrumbingBreadcrumbing means tossing someone only small signs of interest to keep them hooked, without really meaning it.
- SituationshipA situationship is a connection with closeness or sex but no clear commitment – more than nothing, but not a relationship.
- Slow FadeWith a slow fade, contact is wound down bit by bit until it fizzles out – the quiet, creeping form of ghosting.